


Perfect Distraction

by jl_micasea



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: All Rights Reserved, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Body Worship, Do Not Translate, Do not repost, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Felix is a sweetheart, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, Oral Sex, Romance, SKz Smut, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Stray Kids Smut, Swearing, Unrequited Crush, Vanilla, stray kids x reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-14 06:43:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28916304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jl_micasea/pseuds/jl_micasea
Summary: Felix is the perfect, untouchable man you can only long for from the back of the college lecture hall. Until a chance encounter and offer of distraction brings those yearnings closer than you’d ever have thought was possible.
Relationships: Lee Felix (Stray Kids)/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 58





	Perfect Distraction

**Author's Note:**

> Repost from my old Tumblr account.  
> Another of my most popular works, and I really hold this one dear, for several reasons. I really hope you enjoy this. Feedback massively appreciated through either AO3 or Tumblr. Please consider leaving kudos or a comment on this if you enjoyed it, they're all responded to and are what keeps me motivated. ~Mica  
> ~ [Tumblr](https://jl-micasea.tumblr.com/)  
> ~ [Ko-Fi](https://ko-fi.com/jlmicasea)

##### Felix’s back was a profound thing.

You’d seen it a hundred times, your gaze often landing on it when you found yourself looking for a distraction from the monotony of your lecture. Some might say that it was natural for his back to be the first thing you saw when you looked up from your desk, because he just happened to be right in front of you. Although you doubted they’d deem it natural if they knew how intently you examined it day after day.

Yet that didn’t make it any less extraordinary. Or rather, it wasn’t his back itself that was extraordinary. By all accounts, it was a perfectly ordinary, normal back. It was more the things you felt, while looking at said back, that made it special. Made it stand out from the rest.

He’d become broader since your first lecture together. You could almost create a play by play in your head of how his back had looked the first time you’d seen it, and how it had changed over the passing weeks and months.

His soft silver tresses collected neatly at the base of his neck, highlighting the pale complexion of his skin. The days where he’d clearly rushed to get to class were your favourite, if only because you got to feast on the sight of his hair laden and matted with traces of sweat, a result of his exertion to make it in time, especially when he let it grow longer than usual. Those days were a treat.

The outlining curves of his shoulder blades beneath his shirt were also far more prominent now. The way the fabric would stretch snugly across his skin when he moved would offer you a glimpse of the muscle beneath, and it was on those occasions you’d have to force yourself to look elsewhere. It shouldn’t have affected you so much, and you knew that.

But it did. The gentle movements of his shoulders that signified his intake of breath, or the times he’d simply scratch the back of his neck, no doubt feeling the eyes burning into the back of it, would make you needlessly giddy.

You’d lost count of the number of times you’d imagined what his back felt like. Would it be soft to touch? Maybe he’d be surprisingly firm. How would it look with the absence of that black shirt? You could only dare to dream.

And dream you did. The thoughts you conjured up while relishing in the vision of his lean, sculpted back were enough to make you shudder with need. But you also knew that that was all they’d ever be. Thoughts. Fantasies.

Felix was off limits, for you and the majority of other girls on campus. Not that he had a partner, as far as you knew, he was single. He just simply radiated the aura of someone too perfect to be anything but that. Untouchable to the masses, to be admired from a distance.

So you’d bottle up these wanton products of your imagination, burying them deep enough that they wouldn’t surface when he was around, resigning yourself to dealing with them later.

By yourself.

* * *

##### “… And that’ll be all for this lecture, make sure you cover the assigned chapters before the next class, yes?”

Resounding grunts of agreement and promises of assurance to your Professor came up from around the hall, despite the lacking intentions behind them as everyone was focused on gathering their things and leaving the room as quickly as was humanly possible.

That was one thing you were particularly grateful to your parents for. The consistent harping on you’d been subject to about how important it was for an aspiring academic to be studious had been nothing short of effective, and you’d made a habit of reading several chapters ahead and completing assignments whenever you could to avoid the last minute cramming and panic studying.

And yes, that might have been at the expense of any sort of social life, but in all honesty, you didn’t consider that to be a great loss. College was a stepping stone in your life, and while others used it to party and make friends, you were determined to drain of it its’ resources and do everything possible to give you the best start once you stepped out into the ‘real world’.

Releasing a small sigh of exasperation, you shoved your laptop into your bag, hiking it to your shoulder and rearranging your oversized hoodie around you as you stood from your seat, making your way to the exit.

You absolutely, wholeheartedly did not regret not putting in more effort with your classmates. Not a single bit. Not even when they were all talking about how sick last nights’ party was or how hilarious that thing you’ll never know about was…

You left the laughs and excited chatter of your classmates behind as you exited the hall, the weight on your heart stinging just that little bit more with the way they didn’t so much as spare a glance in your direction.

You were essentially invisible. But that was fine. That was how you wanted it. Wasn’t it?

“Uh, excuse me?”

You wondered how difficult it would be to try and slot yourself into their social circle now. The friendships they’d made were probably already pretty solid…

“Hello?”

There almost definitely wasn’t room for another person. And even if you tried, what would you say? They’d surely think you were a freak for even trying to be friends with them out of the blue. Maybe you should just-

“Hey!”

A gentle tapping on your shoulder pulled you out of your head, bringing you back to the real world with a deafening thud.

Although the moment you turned to face the intruder of your thoughts, you could have sworn you were dreaming.

“Hi… You were away with the fairies, huh?”

The perfect, untouchable object of your desires was stood right in front of you. Talking and exposing that bright eyed smile, to _you_. Felix… was looking at you.

He was… looking at you, right?

You risked a glance over your shoulder, checking for the presence of another person just to be sure. There was no reason you could think of in the world for him to talk to you, let alone approach you first.

“Are you… okay?” He laughed, and the sound was simply divine. Magic incarnate. You almost melted on the spot.

Your breath caught in your throat, your heart thumping so quickly you were sure he’d hear it as the question gave you confirmation that he was, in fact, addressing you.

You knew you should speak, answer his question, say _anything_. But the ability to form words had firmly escaped you.

“It’s Y/N, right?”

He knew your fucking name. _How_ did he know your name?

“Uh, you left this behind,” he smiled, seeming to miss the way you were all but falling apart at the seams. “I figured you’d want it.”

He held his hand up, clasping the ludicrously expensive information technology book you’d bought only weeks ago to help with your essays. Had you really left it behind? You wanted to kick yourself.

“Here.”

He held the book in front of you, gesturing for you to take it. And you tried. You _really_ did.

But your fingers had other ideas as the bones in them seemed to evaporate, and the book promptly fell from your fingertips, landing with a thud on the laminated floor of the corridor.

Felix shot you a look of surprise, while your eyes remained fixed to the book and your cheeks burnt as you moved on autopilot.

You couldn’t be entirely sure what happened next, but by all accounts, the two of you seemed to have the same idea as you both moved to pick up the book at the same time, resulting in a wonderfully awkward crack of your heads connecting.

The impact sent you reeling backwards to the floor, and you landed with all the grace of a hippo on your butt as the dull ache in your forehead swept through to the back of your head, granting you an instant headache.

Felix rubbed at his own forehead, a brief expression of grimacing pain on his face before he laughed it off as nothing but an accident.

You wanted to die.

“You alright?” He asked, outstretching his hand to you.

Quite frankly, you weren’t. But you couldn’t tell him that.

Instead, you took his hand, trying desperately to conceal the shakes your body had adopted as he clasped his fingers around yours, pulling you gently off the floor and collecting the book with his other hand.

His touch was cold, but his skin was almost unbearably soft. Your chest throbbed at the simple contact, your mind running wild while your mouth remained firmly shut.

“Here-”

He spun you around carefully by the shoulders, and you were sure your heart was going to explode. You heard the gentle sound of your backpack zipper coming undone as Felix opened it, slipping the book inside and sliding it closed again.

“All done!” He sighed as he turned you back around, patting your shoulders before he released you.

You didn’t want him to release you.

“I’ll see you around then?”

You wanted to just fucking say something. Anything. Thank him for giving you your book back. Apologise for almost knocking him out. But the words lingered on the tip of your tongue, refusing to manifest. So you simply nodded.

He shoved a hand into his pocket, sweeping a hand through his silken tresses as he flashed you another small smile, before turning on his heel and walking away.

You could do nothing but stare at him. At his back. The back that you’d fantasised about for too long. The back that was almost as beautiful as his front.

If the ground ever wanted to swallow you up, this would have been the perfect time.

Because that had been nothing short of fucking catastrophic.

* * *

##### Weirdo. Mute. Damaged. Social reject.

These were just a few words among many that you speculated were circling around your classmates right now.

After what happened with Felix yesterday, you were sure that every person on your course now knew what an utter outcast you were. Gossip had a way of travelling around campus like wildfire, and after that cluster-fuck of an encounter, there was no chance in hell you were going to be able to make friends now.

_Leave it to me to make a good first impression._

You settled into your seat, allowing yourself a moment to collect your thoughts and prepare for the roasting that was surely to come as you were one of the first to arrive for the lecture, which admittedly, was nothing unusual.

Pulling your books and laptop out of your bag, you busied yourself with something else, doing anything to look as unassuming as possible. Perhaps you’d get lucky and they just wouldn’t notice you were there. That had happened before.

You tensed as you caught your classmates flooding into the hall through your peripherals, your heartbeat quickening in speed the more that entered.

And surprisingly, not a single glance was thrown in your direction. As per usual.

Chatter and laughter resounded through the room, everyone talking amongst themselves and teasing each other, not paying you so much as a second thought. As per usual.

The seats at the other side of the room filled, friends sitting with friends, cramming into the closest spots they could get to be together as the seats around you remained utterly empty. As per usual.

You released a small sigh of relief, your gaze fixed to the blank screen of the laptop in front of you as you waited for the other shoe to drop. Perhaps they were saving their retorts for later? Waiting until everyone arrived for maximum effect?

“Good morning, Y/N.”

You shot up straight in your seat, looking over the top of your laptop screen at the face of the man who’d never once greeted you before class, let alone spoken your name out loud. Now that was anything _but_ usual.

You hadn’t even seen him come in. How could you have missed him coming in?

His expression was gentle, a soft smile on his face. His silver locks were swept back over one side of his forehead, exposing the multiple piercings he had in his ear. He looked too good to be real, but that was standard for Felix. Above average in almost every way.

“How’s the head?” He grinned, cocking his head at you.

An immediate rush of blood to your cheeks made you conscious of how you looked, and you sank back behind the screen of your computer.

“I’m… s- sorry,” you croaked, proud of yourself for managing to actually speak this time, despite how it came out.

Felix cocked his head, reaching across the desk as he pushed your laptop screen down, allowing him a clear view of you.

“What are you sorry for?”

You sank even further back into your chair, avoiding his gaze as you died of embarrassment all over again. Although you couldn’t help but feel like he was enjoying this.

“F- for yesterday. We b- banged.”

“Oh?” He smirked, raising an eyebrow at your choice of phrase.

“B- banged heads! We b- banged our heads together! With the book? We… we hit our… our…” Your words trailed off as you realised Felix was trying too hard to stifle his laughter, clearly having fun with your flustered state.

You shoved your head into your hands, your complexion now burning with fire at his blatant teasing.

“It was an accident. Don’t worry about it.” He laughed, shaking his head at you.

You nodded against your hands, wanting nothing more than to move on from the whole thing.

“So did you finish those chapters? The ones we were supposed to read?” He asked, politely changing the subject.

You slid your hands down from your face, grateful that he seemed to have picked up on your helpless cringe as you took a deep breath.

“Y- yeah. I’m ahead, I think.”

“Ahead?”

You hummed in response, flicking open the book that you’d earmarked and written notes in, finding the chapter you’d read up until. Now this was something you definitely could talk about with relative ease, motivation willing.

“Here, see? I’ve read up to this part.” You smiled, sliding the book around to face him.

Felix pursed his lips, nodding in quiet appreciation as he looked over the page you’d shown him.

“Wow, you really are ahead. Do you always do that?” He asked.

“Yeah, I guess. I like to be prepared.” You shrugged.

You wondered if he’d think you were weird for that. You didn’t often hear your classmates talk about how cool the subjects they’d read up on last night were, but, he had asked. This was normal, right?

“I admire that.”

Your eyes flew open as the impromptu compliment hit your ears, once again knocking you for six. He… _admired_ you? Wasn’t that a tad strong?

“R- really?” You stammered, closing the book.

“Sure,” Felix smiled, resting his chin in the palm of his hand as he looked at you. “I could use your commitment. I get easily distracted. Short attention span.”

You couldn’t believe that to be true, but you could only take his word for it. He seemed so attentive in class. Then again, all you’d ever really seen of him was his back.

“Well, I could use your attention span. I get too caught up in this, and a distraction is good sometimes. Probably.” You half-laughed, trying not to sound too sad in your lack of a social life.

Felix cocked his head at you, his eyes narrowing as his jaw seemed to tense. His fingers curled to his cheek, a subtle motion that for some reason sent sparks of tingling anticipation through your bones. He was laced with an expression you’d never seen before, and you weren’t sure how to react.

“O- oh,” you stammered as you tried to wave off any offence you might have caused him with the compliment you were sure came off as nothing but backhanded now that you thought about it, “I’m s- sorry, I don’t mean to agree with you, I’m sure you’re very committed, I j- just-”

“Why don’t I be your distraction?”

* * *

##### It had been exactly six weeks and three days, since your first encounter with Felix.

Since he’d offered to be your distraction.

And he was the perfect one, in every way.

Suffice it to say that you finally felt like your college life had started. In fact, you were beginning to see things in an entirely different way altogether. Little things you’d never noticed before suddenly made themselves apparent, as if you were granted eyes to see things with clarity now that Felix was shedding the warmest of lights into your life.

He’d dragged you to socials, taken you shopping when you should have been in class, convinced you to go to the movies with him when you’d planned to visit the library, and turned your home studying sessions into impromptu karaoke nights, with only so much as a mild suggestion and an ornery smirk. And you wouldn’t have traded a single second of it.

You’d become closer than you’d ever imagined, and even in this short space of time, it was undeniable to you now that you were hopelessly, irrevocably in love with him.

The crush you’d harboured for so long has blossomed into something far greater, not needing any encouragement from you before you found the fantasies that had once consisted of a single steamy night of passion, developing into wild dreams of an impossible future.

Because as much as you wanted to find the courage to tell him how you felt, you knew you never would.

Being this familiar with Felix, counting yourself among his friends was blessing enough for you. You’d never risk ruining what you had on the baseless hope of having something more. It simply wasn’t worth it.

So the moments like this, where you were simply together, sat in silence in your room, college books and notepads laid out on the small wooden floor desk as the mumble of the television provided subtle background noise, soothed any unsatisfied desires you harboured. This was enough. Being his friend was enough.

… But that didn’t mean you couldn’t admire him.

The pencil in your hand went slack as you flicked your gaze from the notepad in front of you to Felix. He seemed lost in thought, totally focused as he scrawled words to paper, his glance shifting from the open textbook and back again as he wrote. That was just another thing you loved about him. How, despite his tendency to procrastinate, he really could do anything when he put his mind to it.

His hair was longer now, the soft white tresses dangling over his dark brown eyes. His thick lashes grazing the tops of his beautifully freckled cheeks when he blinked or stopped to read something. The perfectly plump form of his lips encased the tip of his thumb, a subtle habit you’d picked up on that he’d adopt whenever he was concentrating.

Without even realising, an adoring smile crossed your face, and you rested your chin in your hand as you suddenly dropped all semblances of potential embarrassment you’d feel if you were caught.

And it wasn’t long before you were.

“I didn’t realise I was more interesting than information technology…” He mumbled, not bothering to look up from his textbook as he called you out.

You hummed in response, eyes fixed to his form as he continued writing.

“You’re very interesting…”

Felix glanced up at you, narrowing his eyes in that sarcastic way you’d grown to know from him before he went back to his book.

“Yeah, well, there’s nothing to see here, so move along lady.”

You stifled a giggle, throwing your pencil to the table as you shoved yourself to your feet, your joints aching from sitting in one position for so long.

“You want something to drink?” You asked, stretching out your back.

“Sure. No ice though, it hurts my-”

“Hurts your teeth, I know. I’ll be right back,” you smiled, cutting him off before he could finish as you left the room.

Your familiarity with Felix wasn’t something you took for granted, and again, it wasn’t that he made you any less flustered or frustrated with the way he looked at or spoke to you. You’d simply learned to control it. Keep it buried. Maintain a facade of implicit friendship on the surface, whilst underneath, all you wanted to do was throw that textbook out of his view and climb into his lap.

But you couldn’t do that.

Huffing a sigh of exasperation, you wandered through to the shared kitchen, as was typical of college accommodation no matter how much you hated it, rifling through the cupboards for cups and then through the fridge for the cola you knew you’d stored away somewhere, out of sight of your grabby housemates.

None of them were home right now, seeing as it was Saturday night, and you were grateful for that. Yet admittedly also a little surprised at how Felix had opted to stay in and study with you instead of taking up one of the many invitations he got to go party. Not that you were about to question that luck.

Filling up the cups with the carbonated beverage, you popped several ice cubes into your own before shoving the bottle back into the fridge, slamming it closed with an exaggerated swinging motion of your arm.

However your arm seemed to adopt a mind of its’ own as you promptly knocked over the glasses on your backswing, sending them tumbling off the counter and smashing beautifully across the tiled floor of the kitchen with a deafening crash.

Shards of glass, small and large got swept up in the wave of cola, flooding across the floor and seeping under your bare feet, much to your displeasure.

“Oh for fucks sake-” You whined, moving to grab the ream of paper towels from the counter, before a rapid thudding could be heard from the corridor.

The door burst open, a breathless Felix appearing before you.

“What the hell happened?!” He asked, taking in the scene of you tiptoeing across the sea of glass and cola with a worrying lack of grace.

“I knocked the fucking cups over, don’t come in here there’s glass everywhere-”

“Stay still.” He interrupted, moving into the room before you could give your warning.

The glass crunched beneath his feet, although it did far less damage to him than it would have to you, given that he was wearing his usual pair of sturdy converse.

“What are you doing, I told you to-”

“Don’t move, Y/N!” Felix interrupted again, the command coming out with a surprisingly harsh tone as he held his hand up in defence. You froze in place, something about the way he was glaring at you making you feel like you should definitely do as you were being told.

His gaze remained locked to your bare feet, conscious of where you were standing as Felix rapidly approached you, wrapping one arm around your waist and hooking the other under your legs. A small yelp emitted from you as he swept you up in his arms, seeming to find no difficulty in doing so.

Your cheeks burnt terribly, the simple contact between you being enough to make your heart race helplessly, yet Felix didn’t seem to notice.

“You’re hopeless, you know that?” He half-laughed, carrying you bridal style until you were safely out of reach of the nasty pieces of glass.

“I… I’m not h- hopeless…”

Felix cocked his head, the small action unwittingly bringing your faces closer together as he turned to look at you. And for some reason, whatever taunt or tease had been on the end of his tongue, was quickly silenced.

Something about the way your eyes locked, in this close proximity, made you almost lightheaded. You’d never felt so small before. He seemed to hesitate before he put you down, his adams apple contracting with way he swallowed harder than usual. His gaze drifted from your eyes to your lips, a subtle motion, but one that you absolutely caught as the air around you seemed to still, along with your breathing.

But it was over as quickly as it had begun.

He cleared his throat, tearing his eyes away as he lowered you to the floor, dismissing the moment as nothing worth talking about. You were almost grateful for that, seeing as your disguise was crumbling by the second.

“Uh… why don’t you go back to your room? I’ll… I’ll clean up here.” He smiled, sweeping his fingers through his hair as he avoided any direct eye contact.

“S- sure. Thanks.”

You turned on your heel, neglecting to argue with him about the cleaning. You were almost too eager to get away as you needed space to breathe and room to bury your feelings all over again.

Mind running a thousand thoughts a second, you brought your hand to your chest as you headed back to your room. You were sure there had to be some rational explanation for whatever the hell had just happened.

There had to be.

* * *

##### It was well past midnight.

The dull flickering of the candle on your bedside table was offset by the amber glow of your lamp, the two light sources being the only thing in your room that offered any illumination.

But that was just how you liked it.

Something about the soft light surrounding you made you feel almost melancholy, in the nicest of ways. It was soothing, warming, and created a perfect atmosphere for your reading or watching mindless television.

Felix had left around an hour ago, wishing you good night and making his way back to his own dorm. Under normal circumstances, you would have gone to bed. But after the events of earlier, your mind wouldn’t allow you any kind of rest just yet.

Indeed, for the entire afternoon, you’d been unable to concentrate on anything other than the look in his eyes when he’d carried you. How they seemed to shine more than usual, which was something you’d never believed possible. But Felix had a way of surprising you, time after time.

You sunk into the pillows you’d propped up around you, pulling your blanket and the ruffled bed sheets closer to your body. You were only half watching the movie, and in truth, you couldn’t even remember the title of it. You’d just needed something to distract yourself, something to lull you into the throws of sleep.

It very clearly wasn’t working. Felix was the only thing that could distract you from anything, but right now, he was the source of your problems. It was wildly frustrating.

A quiet buzzing sound picked up from your left, and you dragged your arm from the cocoon of warmth you’d built around you, pawing for your phone.

Your fingers eventually connected with the cold glass of the screen, and you settled yourself back into your fort as you flicked it to life. One new message.

From him.

_[00:34] You awake?_

It wasn’t unusual for Felix to text you like this, late at night. What was unusual was that it wasn’t him sending a panic text for an assignment he’d forgotten to do, or asking to borrow your notes before class the next day. He was simply asking… if you were awake?

[00:35] Yeah, I’m up

You hit the send button, pursing your lips in anticipation of his response.

_[00:36] Why?_

Why? You knew why. But you couldn’t tell him that.

[00:36] Just can’t sleep, I think?

_[00:37] Me too_

Obviously. Or he wouldn’t be texting.

[00:37] Did you need something?

_[00:38] Maybe_

[00:38] What’s with the cryptic, lol

You couldn’t be sure what was going on, but this certainly felt very out of character for him. The idea alone was making you worry.

 _[00:40]_ _Can I come over?_

Your heart caught in your throat as you read the innocent message, and you drew that up to the day you’d had. You’d been tense ever since the glass incident, and now you were reading way too much into things.

_[00:42] Y/N? You there?_

There’d never been a problem with him coming over before. He was a friend. Yes, you worshipped the ground he walked on and harboured a burning love for him, but on the surface, he was still just a friend. This was innocent. Right?

_[00:45] Guess you fell asleep. Sweet dreams princess_

_[00:46]_ ❤

“P- princess?!” You yelled out loud, choking on the little word. That was definitely new. And the heart? Also a new emoji he’d never subjected you to. What hell was happening?

Hands trembling, you quickly tapped out a reply.

[00:48] Come over

[00:48] Please?

You had to see him. You needed to. You had no doubt that your sanity depended on it, and after those messages, there was no way you were getting any sleep tonight anyway. So might as well spend it with the one who denied you of that rest in the first place.

_[00:50] I’ll be right there_

* * *

##### You knew you weren’t expected to be even remotely presentable at this time of night, but you were also pretty sure that the impending arrival of anyone’s long term unrequited love would be enough to persuade them into at least brushing their hair.

With the short amount of time you had, you’d done exactly that, in addition to freshening up as well as you could with the way your hands were shaking.

Now, the most important thing was to steel your nerves. Get a hold of yourself. Suggest to watch a movie, and hopefully, the worries will settle themselves.

**_*knock knock*_ **

_Oh god._

“C- coming!” You called, pulling the sleeves of your oversized hoodie down over your hands, if only to hide your seemingly uncontrollable shakes from him.

You rushed over to the door, clicking the lock and pulling it open.

And the sight of him was just as breathtaking as it ever was.

Clad in comfortable grey sweats and a black shirt, his silken silver tresses hanging over his hazel eyes. His sharp features seemed even more striking at this hour, and you had to resist the urge to pinch yourself.

“Hi…” He muttered, offering you a weak smile.

There was immutable tension in the air. And you had no idea why.

“Hey,” you breathed, holding the door open for him as you stood aside. “Come in.”

He did so willingly, one hand shoved in his pocket as he made his way inside. Normally, he’d have thrown himself on the bed, making himself comfortable and ignoring your protests to at least take off his shoes.

But this time, he seemed… awkward. Like he was waiting for the invitation.

“You… can make yourself at home,” you laughed, closing the door behind him.

“I know.”

He plopped himself down on the bed, looking around your room with a newfound interest.

“Nice decor.” He mused.

“What? You’ve seen my room a hundred times.” You replied, furrowing your brow at him.

He shook his head slowly, eyes resting on the flickering candle that created hapless shadows against your beige coloured wall.

“Not like this…”

You soon realised that actually, he was right. This was the first time he’d seen your room so late at night. Contrary to the airy and bright feeling it had during the day, the nights were far cosier thanks to your drawing of the blackout curtains and your lighting of choice.

In fact, with Felix here, it felt almost intimate. The thought made your mouth run dry.

“What, uh… what do you want to do then?” You eventually asked, desperate to change the subject as you moved over to your collection of DVDs and boxed anime collections on the shelf.

“Weren’t you already watching something?” He asked, gesturing to the television that was currently sporting a paused film.

“Y- yeah, I was. Well, kinda. I wasn’t really watching it.”

Felix cocked his head, patting the spot on the bed next to him.

“Let’s just finish this, then. Come here.”

You nodded in understanding, wringing your fingers apprehensively as you approached the bed and climbed on with him.

Again, this was something you’d done a few times before. You’d survived it then, so you could survive it now.

“Can I get in? Do you mind?” He asked, lifting the bed sheets with his hands.

“Oh, sure.” You smiled, standing off the bed as he tucked his legs under the duvet. He held it aside, once again tapping the spot next to him.

“You too.”

You simply nodded again, your heart thudding too quickly for you to trust whatever would come out of your mouth right now if you tried to speak.

You clambered across the bed, sliding into the sheets next to him, your backs to the wall and the pillows surrounding you comfortably. It was perfectly snug, and the atmosphere only deepened in intimacy the moment Felix hit the play button on the remote.

The movie stuttered to life, and you knew almost immediately, that neither of you were interested in it. People don’t start watching movies in the middle, just as you wouldn’t watch it backwards, so really this whole idea made no sense.

It undoubtedly felt like an excuse. An excuse for him to be here. An excuse for him to get into your bed. An excuse for him to… see you?

You shook the daring thoughts out of your mind, mentally scolding yourself for even thinking that way. You knew better than to hope that Felix was feeling the same things you were, much less that he’d go out of his way to conjure up a reason to see you.

It was ridiculous.

* * *

##### And so the movie droned on, and as time passed, the tension in your bones began to gradually subside.

Your heartbeat slowed, your nerves calming with the relaxation his presence offered you, and you found yourself relishing in the moment with him. It was a rare one.

You sunk back into the pillows, curling your knees under the sheets and releasing a small sigh of happiness. An innocent enough gesture, made all the cosier as the warmth of the sheets around you, and of Felix next to you crept into your bones.

The subtle rising and falling of his shoulders, coupled with his rhythmic breaths began to act as a lullaby, your lids becoming heavy with the callings of sleep. You’d never have thought it possible to sleep when he was around, but surprisingly, you felt nothing but content. Safe. Like him just being here was enough to ease you of any worries you had.

The strength in your neck began to fail you as sleep tugged at your consciousness, your head resting on the nearest pillow-like surface you could find.

Felix’s shoulder was just as warm as the rest of him, firm under your head but at the same time, soft to touch.

You felt him shift next to you, the bed dipping with the change in his position when a strong arm encircled your waist. You were once again surrounded in safety as he pulled you to his chest, your head now resting on his pectoral muscle. A small hum escaped you as you nuzzled into his form, the subtle scent of his cologne washing through you, your eyes held closed.

Gentle fingertips found the back of your head, and careful strokes through your hair sent you even deeper into a sense of sleep. It felt nice to be touched like this, and much to your surprise, you weren’t freaking out about it. Perhaps it was the exhaustion catching up with you, or the way Felix simply made you feel so at peace, but you didn’t want it to stop. You didn’t want to run away.

“Are you tired, princess?”

His words were barely a whisper, the raspy tone to his voice reverberating through your ear so close to his chest. You were tired, but you didn’t want to sleep. You wanted this moment with him so much more.

“No…” You replied, the word coming out as a breath.

Felix threaded his fingers through your hair, his other arm circling your shoulders as he held you close. You felt his chin atop your head, and a deep inhalation of air that would have indicated he was taking in your scent, but that couldn’t be right.

Why would he do that?

“Shall I turn off the movie?” He whispered.

You curled your fingers into his shirt, nuzzling even closer to him in your sleep induced haze.

“Only… if you’ll keep holding me…”

You hadn’t considered the consequences of those quiet words mumbling from your mouth, and in fact, you hadn’t even thought twice about it. You’d simply spoken as your heart had demanded, and worse than that, you still weren’t freaking about it.

Felix seemed to tense beneath you, the muscle of his chest hardening for just that split second as your plea fell on his ears.

You felt him shift again, and were subsequently plunged into an amber darkness as he flicked off the television with the remote. Now, the only light in the room came from the bare flame of the candle and the small bedside lamp, and the air became thick with something you couldn’t identify.

You risked opening your eyes, cracking them open as you looked up at him.

And your breath caught at the sight of him.

His sharp features were highlighted by the soft glow of flame, his complexion seeming clearer than you’d ever seen it. His eyes were hooded and dark, yet they reflected the flickering light with a heart wrenching intensity in the way they were sparkling. His bottom lip was caught between his perfect teeth, and he released it as his gaze locked with yours, the plump flesh glistening just enough.

You sat upright, pulling yourself away from him as you could do nothing but stare. Your breathing became laboured, your sense of inhibition drowning in the sea of his eyes as the two of you seemed to approach a crossroads.

Even with no words, no manifestation of desires, the electricity in the air was painfully apparent. The look he was giving you, the way he reached out to graze his fingertips across your cheek… it was unmistakable to you now.

“Y/N, I…”

He paused, the words hanging from his tongue as he searched inside himself for the right thing to say.

“I think…”

You shook your head, placing your hand over his on your cheek.

“Don’t,” you muttered. “Don’t say anything. You don’t need to.”

The appeal was almost more for yourself than it was for him. You could hope beyond hope that he might reciprocate your feelings, but more likely than that, he was simply lonely. If you had your right head about you, you wouldn’t be entertaining this, if only because you knew you’d end up getting hurt when he inevitably cuts things off or tells you it was 'just a mistake’. But any semblance of rational thought or judgement had escaped you the moment he’d touched you.

“I do.” He replied, lacing his fingers with yours as he brought your hand down to his lap. “I have to do this.”

“Felix…”

“I think I’ve… fallen for you.”

The hushed confession forced a gasp from your lips, yet it wasn’t one of surprise or disbelief. It was quite simply the only way you could find, in that moment of vulnerability with him in front of you, to express what those words did to you.

He’d stolen the breath from your lungs, spirited away any ability to think or speak properly as your eyes began to water, an involuntary response to the boy of your dreams telling you that he just might be feeling the same way about you.

Felix slid closer to you, the sheets around you ruffling with his movement.

The room was utterly silent, the only discernible sounds being those of your breaths that were becoming increasingly ragged as he once again reached out to touch your cheek.

You leaned into his palm, eyelids fluttering with the heady warmth his touch offered. Felix watched you in awe, the shadows cast on his features changing with the gentle flicker of the candle flame.

Inch by inch, he approached you, his other hand settling on your shoulder as if to hold you in place.

“Can I… kiss you?” He whispered.

Wild butterflies took flight in your stomach at the question, more impossible daydreams coming to life with each passing moment.

You felt your cheeks flushing, your chest rising and falling desperately as you simply nodded in consent.

Felix approached you once again, the gentle hand on your cheek sliding down to the side of your neck, sweeping several strands of your hair behind your ear as he did so.

His gaze flicked from your eyes to your lips, slow and careful as he closed the painful distance between you.

It was a tentative touch, the warmest thing you’d ever felt as Felix melded his lips to yours with the most attentive of caresses. Every nerve in your body sparked, your head spinning with desire as he simply pressed against you, as if not wanting to scare you away. Giving you time to get used to how this felt.

But you didn’t need time. You’d never get enough of that sensation, yet it was over all too soon as Felix pulled away.

Still holding you gently, his hooded eyes bore into you, his lips parted with expectancy as he assessed your reaction.

“Do it again…” You pleaded, your cheeks burning a deep shade of red.

Felix leaned back in, granting your request as he pressed his lips to yours once more, leaning over you just enough to marginally deepen the kiss. He kissed you for longer this time, carefully changing his angle from left to right, barely audible sounds of moisture emitting from the two of you with the connecting and breaking of your lips.

Once again, he pulled away, his own cheeks flushing with the intensity of the moment.

You reached out to him, sliding your hand to the tresses at the back of his neck as you pulled him back in.

“Again…”

Felix bit his lip, shaking his head gently, resisting your pull.

“Y/N, if we keep this up… I won’t be able to stop myself.”

“Then don’t…” You replied, desperate for him to touch you again. “We don’t need to stop. I’ve wanted this… _you_ , for far too long, Lix.”

“I know.” He replied, lacing his fingers with yours as he brought your hand down from his neck.

You froze in place, eyes growing wide with the realisation that he’d known all along how you felt. You knew you weren’t exactly the subtle type, but had all your efforts to bury your feelings really been for nothing?

“Y- you knew?”

“I had an idea,” he muttered, his voice low. “Now I know for sure.”

“But how?”

Felix smiled, as if recalling fond memories. He swept his thumb over your knuckles, an affectionate gesture that created goosebumps up your arms.

“Little things you’d do. Passing comments you’d make. I know you think they probably went unnoticed, that _you_ went unnoticed. But… you didn’t, Y/N. I always saw you. Do you remember the day we met?”

You nodded in response, the beginnings of tears stinging your eyes with his monologue.

“I’d actually planned to talk to you for weeks before that. I guess I could never find the courage. You always looked like you wanted to be left alone, but… when you left your book behind, I figured it was the perfect excuse.”

He smiled again, his gaze fixed to your hand.

“You didn’t say a word to me, back then. I kinda thought you hated me, actually.”

You released a small laugh of disbelief, unable to stop a tear from flowing as it rolled down your cheek. Who’d have thought your little display of frustration and inability to act like a normal human would make the one boy you adored more than anything, think that you hated him.

“But I had to know you. I wanted to help you, be your excuse for having fun and learn what was going on in that head of yours. And the more I learnt, the worse it got. I… I couldn’t stop myself, Y/N. You well and truly tripped me up.”

He looked back up at you, his expression rife with adoration at the recollection of the time you’d spent together, and the faintest traces of hope for the future you might have.

“I was supposed to be _your_ distraction. But you ended up becoming mine. You ended up becoming everything, Y/N.”

More tears escaped you, the overwhelming emotions his words caused you manifesting as quiet sobs. It was very nearly too much for you to handle, and it definitely didn’t feel real.

“I… I don’t know what to say-” You whimpered, removing your hand from his as you swept your sleeve over your tear stained cheeks.

Felix shook his head, taking a deep breath to steel himself.

“I know this is a lot. I’m sorry.”

You blinked away the last tears that remained, cocking your head at the perfect boy in front of you. He’d just apologised. For telling you how he felt. For knitting your fragile heart together and returning your love. He was _sorry_ for that.

An overwhelming surge of desire swept through you, coupled with a wanting you’d never quite felt before. You had desires when he was around, of course, but hearing that sincere confession and seeing the way he seemed to be struggling to keep himself together right now, the urge creeping over you was wrought with selfless giving.

You wanted to make him feel better. Wanted to please him. Wanted to show him how much you needed him.

Any way you could.

You shuffled to your knees, placing your hands on his shoulders. He looked up at you in confusion, his eyes widening as you gradually pushed him to his back.

“Y/N, I don’t think-”

“Stop,” you muttered, cutting him off before he could protest. “Let me do this. Please.”

You threw the bed sheets aside, straddling his lap and leaning over him as you reconnected the kiss he’d denied you earlier.

Yet this time, it was entirely different. Now confident in your feelings for one another, Felix seemed to let himself go tenfold.

His hands took hold of your thighs, sliding under your shorts just enough to tickle at the skin beneath as he traced your form. You placed your hands either side of his head, caging him into your embrace as you kissed him with equal fervour. His tongue slicked against your lips, creating soft sounds of moisture and setting the knot in your stomach to a new level of tightness as you met it with your own. One hand moved from your thigh to your neck, his fingers lacing amongst your tresses as he pulled you ever closer to him, deepening the kiss.

You rasped a barely audible moan into his mouth as he bucked his hips upwards, the bulge in his sweats grazing against your clothed heat just enough to tell you that he was readily worked up. Your body temperature soared, the giant hoodie you were wearing now seeming too warm on you with the added contact of Felix’s hands on you and his erection between your thighs.

Almost involuntarily and entirely without thinking about it, you rocked your hips against his groin, and you were rewarded with the sweetest sounding of whines from his throat as you created a modicum of friction between you. You knew he wanted more with the way his fingertips were now digging into the flesh of your thigh, with how he was bucking up into you, how his cheeks were scarlet with desire.

And you were more than willing to give him more.

You broke the kiss, leaving the two of you breathless as you disappeared from his view, settling between his legs. Felix propped himself up on the pillows beneath him, watching you with a deathly intensity as you took hold of the hem of his shirt. You desperately tried to still your trembling hands as you lifted it over his abdomen, just enough to expose the waistband of his sweats.

The sight of his chiselled abs alone was enough to make you keen, but you had to stay in control as best you could.

You dipped your fingers into the band, looking up at him for reassurance.

His expression was dark, his lip caught between his teeth as he met your gaze. His chest rose and fell with heaving breaths, the tent in his sweats painfully apparent now that you were so close to it.

He nodded in answer to your silent ask for consent, and you slowly began to drag his sweats off him. He tilted his hips up, allowing you to remove them completely, leaving him in his boxers.

A faint patch of wetness stained the fabric, his erection straining against them and begging for release.

Granting him the relief he needed, you took hold of the band and peeled them off him, his rigid length springing free instantly. The sight made your mouth water, the idea of having him inside you almost too much for you to take as you tried to control your urge to ride him.

He was bigger than average, if only slightly, the subtle curve to his smooth cock on full display as it bounced gently against his stomach, the tip glistening with the trickles of pre-cum he’d emitted with the excitement of it all.

You looked up at him again, swallowing hard as you tentatively wrapped your hand around his base. Felix seemed to tense, his jaw locking at your touch, but his eyes never moved from you.

You tightened your grip slightly, experimentally dragging your hand over his length, watching his every reaction. He tensed further, his lids fluttering with your motion as you smoothed him back down, yet more pre-cum seeping from his tip.

And again, without thinking too much about it, your desire to taste him outweighed anything else as you outstretched your tongue and laved it across his slit, collecting the marginally salty substance.

Felix groaned out loud, bucking his hips into your hand, eager for more.

You licked your lips, swallowing down the taste of him as you held your mouth above his soft pink head, pressing a wet, open mouthed kiss to it. He hummed at the feeling, his abs tensing as he watched.

“Can I?” You asked, your question a breathless whisper, and almost redundant by now.

Felix nodded, seeming to take a deep breath as he tried to steel himself.

His consent made your stomach knot, and without wasting any more time, you opened your mouth and slid it down around his length. He was warm and heavy on your tongue, the sensation of him filling you like this making you lightheaded as you took him as far as you could manage.

Felix threw his head back, releasing a deep, drawn out groan of pleasure, his shoulders seeming to sink with the feeling you were giving him as you began to bob your head over him, hollowing your cheeks when you could to suck him every which way.

You kept your gaze fixed to his face, relishing in the way he whined under you, his cheeks burning a fiery red and his fingers curling into the sheets.

Popping your lips off his tip, you allowed yourself a moment to catch your breath, sliding your hand over his wet cock with listless ease. A particularly lewd moan escaped Felix at the action and you keened at the sound of it, your confidence growing with every stroke.

You rolled your fingers around him, applying slightly more pressure around his head, slicking up his cock with the saliva that remained on him. He pulsed in your hand, his groans of pleasure growing more frequent and throaty by the second.

“I… I’m gonna cum, princess…” He warned, his eyes glassing over as you picked up your pace.

You nodded in understanding, clamping your lips back around his head as he notably stiffened at the sensation you offered him. You felt his orgasm approaching, the way his cock became heavy in your mouth, the lashings of pre-cum coating your tongue spurring you into deeper action. You lapped at him desperately, taking his member as far to the back of your throat before you choked, repeating the action over, and over, and over, his whimpers of pleasure descending into something far more carnal as he all but fell apart.

“F- _fuck_ … oh my god-”

Felix brought his knuckles to his lips, sinking his teeth into them and groaning around them as his whole body shook with desire, every muscle in his form tensing helplessly with the approach of his orgasm. Hot, thick ropes of his release shot into your mouth, coating your tongue and sticking at the back of your throat as he came hard and fast.

You swallowed as best you could, the unfamiliar saltiness and slick texture not being particularly pleasant, but being as it came from the man you loved, you could bear with it.

Removing your mouth from him, you swiped your forearm across your lips, watching in mesmerised awe at the fucked out boy beneath you. His hair clung to his forehead, his lips pinker than usual and swollen where he’d tried to conceal his expletives, his erection twitching and diminishing with the intensity of his orgasm.

He took a moment to collect himself before he sat up, and before you could even react, he’d crashed his lips to yours. You wondered if the taste of his cum on your mouth would bother him, but in stark contrast, it seemed to have the opposite effect as he hummed into the kiss, his tongue mixing with yours as he deepened it.

Your own wanton desires bubbled beneath the surface, your overwhelming wetness all the more apparent now that he seemed to be guiding you to your back.

“Where did you learn a dirty thing like that, princess?” He purred, sliding his hands up your hoodie as he positioned himself above you, his hands kneading at your bare skin.

You whined in feigned innocence, neglecting to give him an answer as your eyes fluttered closed with his advances. He pressed wet, open mouthed kisses to your neck, suckling firmly, yet not harsh enough to leave a mark.

“You have no idea how many times I’ve imagined you doing that…”

“R- really?” You asked quietly, arching your back and emitting a small moan as he dipped his fingers into the hem of your shorts.

“Really…” He assured, laving his tongue across your collarbone. “It felt even better than I fantasised it would…”

“You’ve… fantasised about me?”

You could hardly believe you were hearing this, given how much time you’d spent doing the exact same thing about him.

He hummed in response, subtly dragging your shorts off your legs without moving too far from you. The contact of room temperature air against your bare heat made you shiver as Felix quickly whipped his shirt off from his head, tossing it to the floor before he returned to you.

You were hyper aware of the proximity between your naked areas, and while you’d made him cum not even moments ago, he already appeared to be raring to go for another round.

“Tell me what you want me to do…” He whispered, tugging at your earlobe with his teeth.

You didn’t even know where to start, despite the fact you weren’t short on ideas to draw from. Everything was happening so quickly, it was almost overwhelming.

“I… I don’t know…” You replied, lacing your fingers into his hair.

“Well then,” he smirked, sinking down from your view. “Why don’t I start by returning the favour, hm?”

Your eyes flew open as you watched him in wonder and mild panic, his gentle hands parting your thighs as he rested on his front, eyes level with your glistening pussy.

“F- Felix?” You mumbled, suddenly feeling self conscious.

“Yes princess?”

You shrunk into the gathering of pillows and the duvet beneath you, wishing it would swallow you whole despite how much you wanted him. The prospect of him touching you was daunting enough, but now that he was _actually_ doing it, you were apprehensive. Worried. Too highly strung to be able to process anything.

“Hey,” he called, propping himself up on his arms as he came back to you for a moment. He tilted your chin to look at him, planting a gentle kiss to your lips in effort to reassure you. “Relax. Trust me.”

You nodded meekly, your cheeks flushing at the fact he even had to do this for you.

“You comfy?”

“Y- yes…”

He smiled softly, soothing your hair from your face before he returned to his previous position.

“I’ll take good care of you, baby girl. Just let yourself go. Okay?”

You took a deep breath, doing your best to mentally prepare for yourself for whatever was to come, but no preparation you could have done would have been enough to steel you for the sensation that followed.

The most unreal of feelings ripped through you as Felix swept his tongue across the hood of your clit. A tentative motion that was purely experimental to begin with, meant to ease you into it. You closed your eyes, your fingers curling into your hoodie, every nerve in your body set alight by his touch.

A low hum resounded from him as he repeated the action, and you moaned quietly, becoming accustomed to the warm, wet feeling of his tongue against your skin.

He lapped at you carefully, his fingertips spreading your labia open just enough for him to access you properly, never giving too much stimulation at any one time. You tensed underneath him as he held his tongue flat against your clit, rippling it with an expert technique that was enough to make your back arch off the bed as you mewled in desperation.

Subtle sounds of moisture emanated from his actions, the wetness of his tongue slicking your already soaking folds, his lips glistening with your juices. Your thighs hardened, your core tightening as he continued his ministrations, alternating between short, rapid flicks and exaggerated drags across your clit as he edged you into your orgasm.

Your head went blank, your vision starring as you sunk further back into the comfort beneath you, your oversized hoodie and the ruffled duvet surrounding you with a sense of safety as Felix made your knees tremble. He took his time, enjoying every small sound, every little move you made in response to his advances, working you up to your release without ever asking what you needed or wanted, because he seemed to simply know.

Body temperature soaring and legs trembling around him, you felt the familiar coil of rampant heat and pressure build up to a euphoric peak as Felix suckled lightly on your swollen clit, his plump lips forming the snuggest of spaces around it, stimulating every angle of your bud through his technique.

He removed his lips, placing a wet kiss to you, his fingertip tracing your outer labia as he explored you with an adoring curiosity.

“You have no idea how stunning you are…” He mumbled, more to himself than to you, his warm breath washing over your heat with the praise that made you whine under him.

Another open mouthed kiss connected with your clit, followed by a tender lick, and another, and one more, his intentions on taking you to your high set in stone as he smothered you with his love.

“F- Felix…” You breathed, your fingers curling into your hoodie, desperate for something to grab if only to stabilise your tremors.

“It’s okay, baby,” he purred, his fingertips tracing over your quivering thighs, “Let go for me.”

Your back arched from the bed, your eyes squeezing shut and his name falling from your lips in a breathless mantra as the knot in your stomach expanded and burst, flooding you with pure white heat and blissful numbness.

Felix rode you through it with soft kisses and careful laps, providing the extra pleasure when you needed it, but never enough that it would be too much. The sheer idea alone that Felix was the one to make you feel this way, make you experience these things you’d only conjured up in your head gave you a wild dizziness, as you now realised you had something much more tangible to cling to.

The object of your dreams and desires was currently nestled between your thighs, having just given you the intensest orgasm you’d ever had. And you were keening for more.

By all accounts, he also appeared to be nowhere near finished with you as he climbed carefully over your body, positioning himself above you.

Your lips connected once again, the post-coital waves of content that were setting in causing your heartbeat to slow despite how much you wanted him. Because Felix felt like home. Being with him like this was entirely surreal, yet entirely right. In this moment, here with him, it felt like the most natural thing in the world.

“I want you…” You whispered, breaking away to look him in the eye.

Felix nodded knowingly, his own complexion just as worked up as yours with the proximity of your respective areas. His solid, lengthy erection so close to your tender pussy was taking your breath away, and the moment his head slid through your folds, you almost wanted to cry.

“Does this mean you’ll be mine?” He replied, his voice low and expectant as he adjusted his hips against yours.

You nodded back at him, tracing the planes of his sharp collarbone before curving your hands over his bare, broad shoulders.

“I’ve always been yours,” you muttered, holding his gaze. “You just didn’t know it.”

An audible groan escaped Felix at your words, burying his head into your neck, his hand taking hold of your thigh, hitching your leg up as he once again slicked his length through your sopping pussy. The friction was heavenly, only sending sparks of wanting through you with the desire to be filled by him.

“P- please…” You whimpered, moaning into his ear.

“Please what, princess?” He cooed, repeating the roll of his hips.

“F- fill me up, make me yours-”

Felix held himself up on his arm, one hand slipping between you as he took hold of the base of his cock. He held eye contact, though his had become visibly darker through the intensity of this moment, the broad head of his length poking at your entrance just enough to tell you what was to come.

“If you need me to stop, or-”

“I’ll never want you to stop…” You interrupted, placing a chaste kiss on his lips for reassurance.

And that was all he seemed to need before his desire to claim you took over.

Your lips parted in silent ardent worship, the delicious stretch of his length filling you sending the butterflies in your stomach to flight. Felix was careful, just as before, aware that this moment wasn’t one you’d get back again. Your first time together was to be cherished and savoured.

But you needed him more than you ever had.

You quickly took hold of the hem of your hoodie, whipping it off your head with little grace as you tossed it to the floor, sinking back into the clammy duvet and pillows beneath you, the absence of your clothing offering some sense of relief from the burning heat that ran through you. Your naked form now on full display to him, Felix’s eyes became heavy as he took you in, his hand reaching up to caress your breast as he eased himself into you completely.

“ _Ahh_ … You’re fucking _beautiful_ -” He mumbled, his jaw tensing with the velvet touch you were wrapping him in and the way you were writhing beneath him.

“Don’t stop…” You whispered, pressing your hands to his bare chest.

He gritted his teeth, his muscles tensing as he began to move inside you, sultry rolls of his hips plunging his rigid length into you again, and again, and again. You moaned helplessly with every thrust, the illicit drag of his cock against your walls and the intoxicating atmosphere in the room proving to be the headiest of salacious combinations.

Your skin ran a feverish heat, a thin film of sweat coating your naked body as Felix moved above you, emitting raspy groans of his own when you clenched around him or bucked your hips up to meet his advances. The dancing light of the candle flame illuminated you both, the sensual form of your bodies creating a playing shadow on the wall, meant just for you.

Just as before, he took his time, his gaze fixed to you as he assessed your reactions and absorbed the sight of you under him. As if he was watching a fantasy come to life, one that he’d never dared to believe could come true.

He maintained his rhythm, knowing just when to adjust his angle or when to slightly increase the pressure of his languid thrusts to get you to whine his name or claw at his chest, and it wasn’t long before you felt him stiffen inside you, his release teetering at the brink.

“Y/N… I can’t-” He whimpered, collapsing above you as you hooked your legs around his hips, pulling him in ever deeper with your feet.

You wrapped your arms around him, your bodies flush to one another, pounding heartbeats and slick skin creating the most erotic of scenes, yet one that was filled with nothing but desire born from unrealised love. It was the purest form of sexual tension you’d ever thought could exist.

His lustful groans seeped through your ear as he buried his head into the crook of your neck, his thrusts slowing as he tried to draw out the sex, yet you could feel he was desperately close.

“Let go for me…” You purred, repeating his words from earlier.

And as if your consent had been the shackle that kept him bound, every muscle in his body began to tremble with his brutal release.

You rode him through it, tracing your fingers over his taut back, the back that you’d admired from afar for so long. You pressed gentle kisses to the side of his head, brushing aside the hair that had matted with the sweat, moaning along with him as his motions reduced to lazy ruts, milking himself for every drop as he filled you to the brim.

It took a while before either of you had any real capacity to speak, both too breathless and strung out to form words or say the things you wanted to say in your rapture. Yet you felt like anything you could say now wouldn’t be news to him. He’d known all along how you felt about him. While you’d been none the wiser as to how he was falling for you.

Perhaps this was how things were always meant to be. The unlikely story of how two people, seemingly worlds apart yet closer in ways they could never have anticipated, fell in love.

If someone had told you six weeks and three days ago, that you’d be lying here with the man of your dreams, his arms secure around you, your head on his chest and his rhythmic, calming heartbeat soothing you into sleep, content in your post-coital bliss and utterly enamoured with each other, you’d never have believed them.

Felix had, initially, been a daydream. A fantasy. The perfectly untouchable man that you’d pined over and longed for, since the first time you’d seen him.

Then, he’d been your distraction. Giving you a taste of what your college life could be like with a friend, giving you a different reason to smile and laugh every day.

Now, through the inevitable passage of time and what seemed to you like an unprecedented stroke of luck, he was yours. Your centre of existence, your reason for being.

And he would surely be the perfect distraction, in every way, for as long as you could hope.

**Author's Note:**

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